Living VIP

Living VIP  (1)

You may be thinking bottle service, red carpets, private parties, royal treatment, high- end fashion, and house staff.  However, this is reality and while this year I am living VIP those things are hardly what I am talking about.  As a busy mom of two of the most wonderful tiny humans on the planet over the past couple years I have learned and thought a lot about where I stand on my own totem pole.   It’s far too easy to get caught up meeting the needs of everyone around you and forget about one very special VIP player in the game of life.  Why do we do this?

I think its pretty simple actually.  Once I entered into the divorce process it was clear to me that my happiness was all on me.   I didn’t have anyone to rely on, blame, help, or expect to bring cheer to my world.  I am in no way suggesting that I thought that was or is the role a spouse should play so bear with me for a minute before you judge.  I simply am saying that once you have no other options, it is easier to see whether you are truly happy yourself.  When balancing family life, work, and all that life throws your way it’s easy to lose sight of and gage that happiness.  Life hasn’t gotten any easier and in no way am I suggesting that divorce is the way to become happy.  I am simply saying that I have learned to be careful and not drown myself, dreams, and needs in a sea of everyone else’s needs, wants, and desires.  Most importantly I have realized that you can only expect people to treat you as well as you treat yourself and I plan on setting the bar quite high.  Too many of us lose ourselves as life gets busy and ultimately what we really lose is our love for ourselves.

I get it, you don’t have time and everyone needs something.  My life is no different, less busy, stressful, or chaotic than anyone else’s.  In fact it’s action packed and full of the kind of stress that should have taken me down by now.  The difference is that I have realized and learned to love myself.  I have had to prioritize differently and even give up some things, but it has been so worth it.  I don’t try to be perfect or lead on to anyone that we’ve got it all together or that I can do it all.  I have found this great comfort and freedom in just being me and being open and honest about where my life is at and the current storylines and plots in it. 

I used to be scared and let fear drive majority of my decisions.  I was terrified of failing, judgment, embarrassment, or flat out disappointing myself.  Now I love to feel a little scared and realize that the things that scare me are the things that I need to go after.  I’m sick of playing it safe and I am sick of coming last.  While I may be a busy lady, this is my life and it’s time I start calling the shots.  It’s time to chase my  dreams and its time to value myself.  In fact, the higher on the totem pole I put myself the better I am as a mom, friend, family member, and one day maybe spouse again.  I don’t mean that I sit on the couch eating Cheetos watching Bravo all day because it’s good for me either.  (Can’t lie that a night or two of that may occur once in a while though.)  Funny though because I rarely even watch TV anymore. In fact when I moved I scrapped the idea of cable because of the cost and while sometimes I miss it, I waste far less time.  I use my time to do things that enrich and change my life.  When I need a movie night I Netflix it up, I just don’t do it all the time.  I work out, have learned to eat healthy, and I am loud and proud about my dreams.  I don’t want to be the person watching everyone else achieve their goals, I want to be the one going for it!

The big issue with finding happiness is that most people are never content with what they have and they don’t realize that they are the only ones who can truly create change in their lives.  Don’t be unrealistic or misunderstand me either.  Life is never nor will it be perfect and all flowers and rainbows.  Life is full of storms that will either make you or break you.  Just know that in every storm you weather, YOU have the choice about who is going to surface after it ends.  You have to constantly be doing the work and doing whatever you can to get your life where it needs to go.  For everyone that will be different, but one thing is the same for all of us.  Happiness is an inside job.  You are responsible for finding and creating it.  Never give anyone or anything that much power of your life.  Not your family, friends, job, illness…nothing!  My life will never be perfect and I’m good with that.  Over the past few years I have learned to dance in the rain and it’s absolutely liberating.  My question for you is what is your year going to look like? Are you going to be sitting around waiting for things to change or are you going to go for it?  I may not be walking any red carpets this year, but one thing I will be doing is living VIP!

-Jessica Nieminski

 

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Leave A Reply (2 comments so far)


  1. Shelby Hermosillo
    2 years ago

    Well said!! I totally agree with everything you said!! We have a choice to make each day & I choose happiness!! I will Not let others bring me down! I choose to fight! I will Not sit around and let life pass me by…I am going for it!!! I’ve gone through Many struggles in the past, but, through my faith, I’ve overcome them & become even stronger!! Looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing because it’s made me who I am today!! And, I’ve been able to help others in their time of need! That’s what it’s all about!!

  2. Francielle
    Francielle
    2 years ago

    Thanks for the comment Shelby!

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