The Last Thing I Expected From Motherhood

By Colleen Salllovemomhearts

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans,” John Lennon croons to us.

I can’t think of a better metaphor for the journey of parenthood. You just don’t know where it will take you, and what will happen along the way, but likely, it will not be what you thought it would be.

Thinking of becoming a mother came later in life for me. I wanted to live for myself: Get a few years of my career under my belt; Travel with my hubby; Have money to spend on clothes and things I wanted, just for me, without guilt.

In the back of my mind, I knew it was likely I’d consider motherhood at some point, but it was easy for me to put it off since I knew it would involve big sacrifices – sacrifices I wasn’t ready to make.

But, we opened the door for babies to come, and they did.

First came baby number one. A daughter. A sweet little honeypot, I learned many of the ropes of parenting with this little girl.

Then came baby number two. A son. I learned quickly that one baby isn’t like another at all. Daughter didn’t nap, and ate very little, but spent a lot of time looking in my eyes, and examining me, and looking deeply soulful, which I loved.

He napped a LOT and slept like a rock. He ate with gusto. I looking forward to him looking in my eyes, too like his sister did, but they were usually closed. He wanted to be held all the time, though.

As they grew, I noticed more differences. She said words early. He said them late but started in phrases. She was nervous and worried about things; he was relaxed and funny as sin. She didn’t bat an eye going to preschool. He wanted Mom to be with him. Whatever she was brave about scared him, and vice versa.

I had no idea how different two people could be, and not just because they were different genders.

As they grew, another funny thing happened. I became motherly to their friends, to every kid that came into our lives.

I love talking to their friends and have a vested interest in these young people. I cherish the times when they sit around my kitchen table and talk to each other. I enjoy asking their friends questions and having them talk to me.

In fact, it’s among my most favorite things to do now. More than buying anything for myself, or traveling, or anything else I might do for myself.

Yep, I had an inkling when I finally made the decision to pursue motherhood I’d love it on so many levels, but I never realized how deeply invested I’d be in love ALL kids like they are my own.

Life is indeed, something that rolls along while you make plans for other things. How lucky we are that we don’t control all that happens to us!

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